Get lost. No, really. Lost. Out in the middle of nowhere, far from the madding crowd, way past the back of beyond. Off the beaten track. Away. Gone. Offski. How? With us, of course, on a safari extraordinaire to some of our favourite spots that make remote seem like Walmart on Black Friday... 



Deep down inside all of us lurks an innate need to escape and run as far away from everyone else as we can, whenever the feeling takes us. We like to dress that need up in fetching khaki and give it a name - safari - and take it as far off the beaten track as it's possible to get without going all Ranulph Feinnes or Ed Stafford. 

We've got a knack for knowing where the really cool and out there safari camps are because we've actually been to them, which means you get the benefit of first-hand experience rather than Chinese telephone, he said, she said and my neighbour's second cousin twice removed once stayed near there.

We call them our "far flung and fabulous" places - a collection of awesome wilderness destinations guaranteed to get you out of the way and reduce the chance of bumping into more than a loose handful of humans to negligible odds.

They're also firm favourites for immersing you directly into what it means to be wild without scrimping on all the comforts we love. We'll have none of that Bear Grylls, naked and afraid nonsense on our safaris. Promise.

So let's have a look at some of the "I'm on safari, get me out of here" frontrunners...

Botswana

Want to play a game of spot the human? Then Botswana's wide open wild spaces are place to do it, but away from the usual circuit, venturing beyond the realms of safari packages into the dazzling hinterland that awaits, courtesy of an expedition par excellence.

Yes, think Livingstone, Stanley and all those other explorer types... Now add in impossibly cute off-grid safari tents, plenty of wildlife and gin... We can do them all for you and we'll throw in a backstage pass to absolute safari heaven in the process. Ask us about Beagle Expeditions and Golden Africa. We'll know what you mean.

Namibia

Basically the whole country is remote, thanks to such a low number of humans per square kilometre of sand. Namibia is a delicious destination designed to delight and deliver deeds of derring-do to determined discoverers demanding dazzling desert diversions. And that's about all of the aliteration we can handle right now.

We particularly heart Damaraland because of its, um, remoteness. And amazing rock engravings. And desert elephants. And gorgeous camps tucked in amongst huge rocks. And sand. Did we mention sand? Or Camp Kipwe? Mowani Mountain Lodge? Onduli Ridge? No? You sure?

South Africa

Believe it or not but it is possible to go remote in the Rainbow Nation. Up in the wild and somewhat woolly northernmost reaches of the country, a couple of hours' drive from Upington and a stone's throw from Augrabies Falls, Tutwa Desert Lodge is one of South Africa's best-kept secrets. And you know how useless we are at keeping secrets, so consider it less secret than it was before you read this blog. 

With its own section of the gorgeous Orange River, meaning you get to do rafting, in the desert. We know, it's pretty amazing, eh? Then, of course, there's Tswalu Kalahari - need we say more? Really? OK then, Pafuri Camp in the Makuleke section of the northernmost part of the Kruger National Park. Enough? You're welcome.

Mozambique         

When it comes to getting away from it all and putting civilisation on the back burner, life, it seems, really is a beach. And one to die for. Mozambique's got a lot of those sort of beaches, all of them drop-dead gorgeous.

This is where you get to do everything from kite surfing and scuba diving to paddle-boarding and kayaking. Or just cruise the gloriously clear waters of the Indian Ocean and be all suntanned and aloof.

We lurve Anvil Bay, AsDunas and Dunes de Dovella for their ability to hide in amongst sand dunes on pristine stretches of coastline. Almost like they have Klingon cloaking devices. Hey, it's a skill. Honestly. 

Tanzania

Whether its the sex appeal of the Selous where you can fly camp in the middle of nowhere or the jaw-dropping awesomeness of Ruaha (and most spots in between), "Tanz" really does do remote rather well. Ruaha is not a line from a Lady Gaga song. It's a stunning and huge game reserve that's full of elephants, buffalo and predators aplenty. As well as massive baobab trees.

The Selous is also a firm fave thanks to its authentic credentials and ability to get you off the map with ease. And if that isn't as sexy as hell then we're damned. Check out Sand River Selous and tell us we're wrong. 

Want to go where very few people in khaki have been before? We've taken a little slice of remote Tanzania and wrapped it up in gorgeous gift paper for you here!